...and 4 more to go!! Ahh! I'm ready for a BREAK! God has been so good on this journey. I know He is with me moment by moment, but the end of this phase is in sight, and it just can't come soon enough. I don't really feel good most of the time. The past week I've been really tired and by mid afternoon I'm not good for much other than sleeping on the sofa. So thankful for those of you who are feeding us, cleaning my house and driving me to treatment!
I do feel confident that the treatments are doing their job. I feel different. What I'm suffering now seems to be more the side effects of radiation and chemo rather than the cancer itself. I'm so thankful that God is working on my behalf and healing me!
So many Psalms speak to me in this time. David was so honest at expressing His feelings but I love that he always ends on a positive note reminding himself of God's goodness and faithfulness in the face of suffering.
Psalm 31:14 is one the many verses that bless me in this time.
Desperate, I throw myself on you: you are my God!
Hour by hour I place my days in your hand,
safe from the hands (cancer) out to get me.
Warm me, your servant with a smile;
save me because you love me!
We definitely do feel so loved and have been warmed by many smiles! This Sunday we have plans to go see Tim Hawkins at The Worship Center. We are ready for some fun and laughter. We planned this way before we knew I had cancer. Please pray that I will be able to go and enjoy it! I plan to do everything within my power to be rested up but some "higher power help" would be nice too!
We don't really know any specific details about the next phases of my treatment yet. The month of May will hold more Dr. appts and planning. It will also be a time for me to heal, gain strength and take a vacation with my family!...oh and turn 42 years old! :)
Blessings to you all! Thank you for your prayers! I'm gonna go snuggle on the sofa!
Marcia
Follow along as Marcia and her family walk this journey to healing from rectal cancer.
Saturday, April 25, 2015
Wednesday, April 15, 2015
Faith is...
..not wishful thinking or believing what you know isn't true. Instead, it is the conviction that God will always do what He promises to do, regardless of the circumstances. Faith proclaims the trustworthiness of God and His complete and willing ability to do what we cannot.
This comes out of a little devotional called "Time for God with Mothers". I love that definition of faith! I am just reminded over and over again how much God wants us to totally trust Him with our lives and that He is totally trustworthy! It is impossible for God to be unfaithful or untrustworthy! He cannot be those things! Let that sink in and build your faith!
I'll be honest, I've sort of been dreading these next 3 weeks and the possible side effects. The doctors say the effects of chemo and radiation are cumulative. It feels a bit like waiting for a bomb to drop.
However, God is giving me grace for each moment and taking away my fear of the unknown. I'm praying that the opposite will be true...that I feel better and better the closer I am to the finish line! Sixteen down and twelve more to go!
My WBC actually came up a bit which is an answer to prayer! I'm enjoying lying on the trampoline these sunny days to boost my Vit D levels which also boosts my immune system. My RBC went down a little so I sent Kyle and Valerie to the store for some steak. It is tricky sticking to a low fiber diet but it is worth it cuz I feel so much better when I do. I am being very intentional about napping every day and not pushing myself. Duane and the kids have been great at running the house.
We are just so thankful for everyone who has blessed us with meals, gifts, transportation and prayers! You are the hands and feet of Jesus! Going to treatment is so much more FUN when you can spend the time with your girlfriends!! I am looking forward to summer and feeling good and having a break from treatments. I am also trying to savor this time and the sweet presence of Jesus as I rest and heal. I will be patient. This is a small part of my journey in the grand scheme of life and I do not want to miss anything that Jesus has for me!
I love you all and have a fabulous day!!
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Hebrews 11:6
But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
This comes out of a little devotional called "Time for God with Mothers". I love that definition of faith! I am just reminded over and over again how much God wants us to totally trust Him with our lives and that He is totally trustworthy! It is impossible for God to be unfaithful or untrustworthy! He cannot be those things! Let that sink in and build your faith!
I'll be honest, I've sort of been dreading these next 3 weeks and the possible side effects. The doctors say the effects of chemo and radiation are cumulative. It feels a bit like waiting for a bomb to drop.
However, God is giving me grace for each moment and taking away my fear of the unknown. I'm praying that the opposite will be true...that I feel better and better the closer I am to the finish line! Sixteen down and twelve more to go!
My WBC actually came up a bit which is an answer to prayer! I'm enjoying lying on the trampoline these sunny days to boost my Vit D levels which also boosts my immune system. My RBC went down a little so I sent Kyle and Valerie to the store for some steak. It is tricky sticking to a low fiber diet but it is worth it cuz I feel so much better when I do. I am being very intentional about napping every day and not pushing myself. Duane and the kids have been great at running the house.
We are just so thankful for everyone who has blessed us with meals, gifts, transportation and prayers! You are the hands and feet of Jesus! Going to treatment is so much more FUN when you can spend the time with your girlfriends!! I am looking forward to summer and feeling good and having a break from treatments. I am also trying to savor this time and the sweet presence of Jesus as I rest and heal. I will be patient. This is a small part of my journey in the grand scheme of life and I do not want to miss anything that Jesus has for me!
I love you all and have a fabulous day!!
Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Hebrews 11:6
But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.
Tuesday, April 7, 2015
Strength for today....
...and bright hope for tomorrow! God is continuing to meet me on this journey. Last week I was feeling a bit blue, hormonal, sad...you get the idea. I was driving alone to meet Duane so we could ride to treatment together. I was telling the Lord how yucky I was feeling and was feeling bad about my attitude. I said out loud, " I just want to hear my song." The words were barely out of my mouth when the music to "His Eye is on the Sparrow" came on WJTL. Of course, I started crying tears of wonder and joy. It was just a very small (big to me!) reminder that God will never leave me. He hears my every prayer! He is covering me with His wings and taking care of every detail of everything!!! He is my Father, He is faithful and He is trustworthy!
I've also had the opportunity to meet with some dear ladies who are gifted in prophetic ministry and healing. God has been impressing on my heart that He cares deeply about every aspect of our health- emotional, mental, spiritual and physical. To be ministered to in a very personal way is a precious thing and truly a gift from the Lord on this journey!
I am continuing to tolerate the treatments pretty well. I am very careful about eating low fiber foods which help to manage (along with Imodium) diarrhea. My insides are a bit tender and I'm a bit more tired but over all the Dr. is very pleased. They will continue to monitor my WBC to make sure it does not go too low. My motto is one day at a time.
Everybody has a story. Waiting for radiation is a bit sad knowing that every person who comes in is battling cancer in some shape or form. Some look very sickly. I often wonder if they have a caring family, someone to bring them, and if they know that Jesus loves them very much! Opportunities are all around us and we all have something to give. The nurses show such compassion and understanding. That is a ministry in itself. They understand that none of us ever wished for this.
That said, I'm so thankful that such a place exists to care for us and that God uses the Drs. and nurses to bring healing.
There is something very special about writing this blog and putting my thoughts and feelings into words. It is a salve to my soul and a sweet way for me to share with you what is happening. I want to remember all the ways that God is caring for me!
Thank you so much for your prayers!
Marcia
II Corinthians 4:16-18 The Message
So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace.
These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us.
There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever.
I've also had the opportunity to meet with some dear ladies who are gifted in prophetic ministry and healing. God has been impressing on my heart that He cares deeply about every aspect of our health- emotional, mental, spiritual and physical. To be ministered to in a very personal way is a precious thing and truly a gift from the Lord on this journey!
I am continuing to tolerate the treatments pretty well. I am very careful about eating low fiber foods which help to manage (along with Imodium) diarrhea. My insides are a bit tender and I'm a bit more tired but over all the Dr. is very pleased. They will continue to monitor my WBC to make sure it does not go too low. My motto is one day at a time.
Everybody has a story. Waiting for radiation is a bit sad knowing that every person who comes in is battling cancer in some shape or form. Some look very sickly. I often wonder if they have a caring family, someone to bring them, and if they know that Jesus loves them very much! Opportunities are all around us and we all have something to give. The nurses show such compassion and understanding. That is a ministry in itself. They understand that none of us ever wished for this.
That said, I'm so thankful that such a place exists to care for us and that God uses the Drs. and nurses to bring healing.
There is something very special about writing this blog and putting my thoughts and feelings into words. It is a salve to my soul and a sweet way for me to share with you what is happening. I want to remember all the ways that God is caring for me!
Thank you so much for your prayers!
Marcia
II Corinthians 4:16-18 The Message
So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace.
These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us.
There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever.
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